She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
