Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
