I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
