It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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