So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize