Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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