do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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