Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
