I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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