Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
there was a trapeze. enough said
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
