At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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