i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
