What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
