You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
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