epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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