Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
My vagina just recognized that song.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
