The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize