Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
