if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
