No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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