He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
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