i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
