idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
