I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
