We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
foreskin is a definite game changer
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
