she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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