ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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