How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
