Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
