The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
