Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
