bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
