Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
