is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
