and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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