I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
