That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
