Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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