note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
