thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
