paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize