My brain says no but my pants say off.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Did I show you my penis last night?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
