I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
