She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
These tits shall not be calmed
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