Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
