Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
She's the barista slut.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
