mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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