i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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