We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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