Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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